Not sure where to start...I've journaled before but never written anything for the world to see.

Okay so here goes...I'm on a mission to lose 50 lbs with Weight Watchers. 50 lbs for me is a long shot. It's somewhat low in my healthy weight range. I just like the number 50 and in my first meeting on 6/6/09 I watched someone get recognized for losing 50 lbs with a magnet or whatever she got. Silly as those little things are they work for me. I wanted to be that person with the 50 lb weight loss and I wanted that damn magnet.

This week I lost 3.2 lbs. I wasn't 100% OP. I was way better with snacking. Mostly because my job moved me to a new crazy office 3 days a week. I work my ass off and either have no time to eat or I'm too nervous to do so. I have mixed feelings about the new office. Love the new co-workers and the setting is so much more professional but I have a nasty commute - 23 miles each way during rush hour. I was also told I had to do this instead of being asked. No compensation of any sort despite me spending more money on gas and more of my time. Nice way to be treated after 14 years of dedicated service.

Anyway back to Weight Watchers. Now that I've managed snacking I have to learn how to control restaurants and wine drinking. Really even from a financial standpoint we shouldn't be eating out so much. From a health standpoint I need to learn how to follow the Weight Watchers healthy guideline that states that a woman should only have one alcoholic beverage a day. Wine and restaurants relax me. Sadly nothing else does as much. I need a way to relax that is not related to food and/or drinking.

I took a dance class today with an instructor that told me directly that he's seen I've gained weight. I've taken classes with him for 2 and a half years. Honestly I think I move quite well for someone my size (currently 5'4" and 173.8 lbs). It's hard to have the confidence to dance in a class where the instructor has already made notice of my size being unhealthily overweight. I've switched from the front row to the second and switched to the side of the room where I can make a beeline for the door after class and therefore can't be addressed by any instructor anymore. The opinions of others should not affect me as much as they do but I guess I've always been sensitive.

Well I said enough for someone who didn't know how to start. Must try to get some sleep soon for another crazy work week.